Thursday, September 18, 2008

Stuff I've Found

-Bullet casings.
-Spent shotgun shells.
-Every type of beer, liquor, whiskey, vodka, gun, rum, cognac, brandy, bourbon, and cheap wine bottles/cans known to man.
-Little plastic bags, like, well, you know.
-Syringes, cigar innards, enough Phillies’ wrappers and sleeves to fill J&R Cigar floor to ceiling, small glass pipes with electrical tape wrapped around the middle and a burn mark near one end. Bobby and Whitney will tell ya about that’s used for.
-A 1930’s era Chevrolet Fleetmaster cop car, in near mint condition.
-A CPR dummy.
-Dead deer, birds, squirrels, mice, rats… I’m amazed I haven’t found any dead people yet.
-Parts to a moonshine still.
-Front end to a Cadillac Eldorado, and engine block.
-Ford Bronco quarter-panels.
-Wicker furniture that someone tried to set on fire.
-Desks, office furniture, things that ought not to be in the woods.
-Picked-apart computer.
-Books, magazines, calendars, doctor/patient records, keys, blue prints, schematics, certificates showing OSHA 10 course completion.
That’s just what I can recall off the top of my head. I’m amazed that I haven’t found a human corpse, Jimmy Hoffa, the Loch Ness Monster, Atlantis, Monica Lewinsky’s blue dress, the Nixon tapes, Sasquatch, The Mary Celeste, Bobby Burns... you know stuff like that.


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